The past month was a busy month.
Soul Survivor, 11 days in Portugal, a Dutch Revival Conference.
More than enough opportunities to enjoy life ánd to be shaken.
It feels like riding a horse: running through the mountains, the valleys, the open fields.
All of that, in just a few weeks!
I have never ridden a horse in my life,to be honest, but somehow I think I understand a little better what it should feel like.
An amazing sense of freedom, to have the reins in your hand, yet to experience  a power that is so much greater than yourself that is driving you forward!
The perfect combination.
It reminds me of my life with the Holy Spirit.
He makes me think that I am in control, and He seems to listen to me, but He does what He wants, far more often than I realize, and I actually don`t mind at all 🙂
I really still believe that he is like a tame gentle horse that listens to me every time I don`t want to do something because of fear or worry.
While all the time the fact is that He is the one that`s in control and has the reins in His hand.
Holy Spirit lives my life, I lean on Him, It’s Him I hold on to. He is driving me forward.
And so now and then I can have a moment of rest so I can make myself believe again that I am the one who is in control….not! 🙂
Haha. I get so filled with joy the more I realize that I can enter this rest and that He is the One who wants to lead me every day.
No more working, no more striving, no more thoughts that tell me something is not right about me, or that I could add anything more to the awesome creation He made me to be…
Okay,I`ll add one word: ,,Yes!!’’
,,Take me away, into the heights, into the depths, take me wherever You want to run…!
The only desire I have is to hear myself shout Yes louder and louder each and every day!’’
Papa said: ,,Nick,you are My image, you are like My shadow, you are like Me!’’
Jesus said: ,,Nick, it is finished, it is done, there is nothing more to add to this work.’’
Holy Spirit said: ,,Nick, I am like that horse. Just let everything go and hold on tight!’’
And I say: ,,Yes! Guys! Yes!’’
I write a lot more than that I publish on this blog.
Sometimes it`s just information, sometimes it`s too personal, sometimes nobody would be able to understand…and sometimes there is something I put online.
It`s guess it`s like the way I write love letters:
I write a letter, and the moment I am done writing I seem to be ready to start writing the real letter!
It`s so funny to bump into one of those letters so now and then.
They never really reached their goal, yet they actually really were a big part of the journey towards writing the real letter! Wow, the greater results comes forth out of the lesser results! I want to embrace both parts of the journey 🙂
So many times I start with something, realizing in the process that it really is not what I wanted.
But somehow it`s thát realization that makes my journey become more and more intense and more filled with Life than anything else!
If you would ask me: Nick, what would you prefer: the things that work out just as you wanted,or the things that didn`t seem to work out the way you wanted?
Than I would honestly have to say that I don`t want to live without both of the options…I guess 🙂

So at the moment I am writing a blog that I didn`t plan to publish. I had written something different.
I wrote a story about my trip to Portugal and other things that happened.
But……never mind. I guess I am the type of person that chooses to follow his heart above his knowledge of what is right or wrong. Well, I like it! Haha.
I love our heart! Our beautiful heart! The centre of who we are! The place of union with Christ!
The source out of which we are allowed to live every day!
My heart is filled with joy, I guess it`s because Mr Joy himself lives there 😉

Heart: ,,I`m sorry that humanity hasn`t given you enough attention. I`m sorry that we have preferred our minds over our hearts.
You are so much more beautiful than we realize. You are so much more beautiful than that religion has made us to believe.
I embrace you,and I will do my best to see humanity return to you.
They don`t know that heaven and earth meet in that place. They don`t know that that is the home they have always been looking for.
Constantly searching for a home, while their home was só close to them all the time!’’
World: ,,Stop running away from home. Come to your senses…!’’
Just as the prodigal son that was home all along, with his Father. But he still thought there was a better home, another place called home,and he walked away…
Eventually he came to himself,to his senses,he remembered where his real home was. And he returned to the core of who he was meant to be, together with his Father, wow!
Running away from ourselves…running away from God…
My desire is that each person will remember where he came from,who he is,and will be able to enter into the rest that is called home!
Maybe I will write more about the past period in another blog.
To be continued…

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